"To the brave and the petrified, we all fall down." -IAMX

Coming to terms and accepting the fact that I have epilepsy has been the biggest challenge of all. Through the medical tests, the medications and all of the doctors visits, facing the fact that this will change my life forever and I will deal with this forever has been the hardest part. There's no explanation why my seizures began except for that God has chosen me as someone brave and strong enough to endure this. A life with no obstacles and hardships is non existent. We all fall down, it's how we pull ourselves up that defines us. Life can be terrifying, especially when faced with a medical issue that will change everything in your life forever. Getting to a point of acceptance is the hardest part but once I got there I felt liberated, strong, and not as scared. I'll always have my days where I feel down and anxious and frightened. It's always in the back of my head that I need to be aware, and take care of my body, and be sure to take my meds every day. There is a fear that I could have a seizure at anytime. There's a fear that I'll go to sleep and rather than waking up on my own, I'll be woken up by paramedics and hauled to the ER in an ambulance. I have reached the realization that no matter what the risk, life is constantly full of them. Life is to short to be scared and hope and acceptance can help me conquer that. A thankfulness that there is far more good in my life than bad. I'm alive, I have an incredible husband and family, my opportunities in life are endless. I have dug deep to find the strength to take epilepsy as a challenge that I will overcome. Although it is a medical condition that I will have forever, there is so much good that overrules the fear and anxiety caused by it. Accepting it has taken so much time and work but has been possible. There's so much beauty in life and I don't want any of it to be shadowed by my epilepsy that I have no control over. No matter how brave or scared, we will all fall down. But we can all get back up even stronger.